Stalker / by admin

I've always wanted one. It's a bit of a 'must have' if you're a male and over 180 lbs and can handle yourself. Unless your stalker is a male too and larger than you, in which case it's not good. Anyway, I had a temporary stalker the other day on the train. A bright blue crushed velvet tracksuit and long impossibly black hair down to his/her waist,  that he/she stroked constantly whilst smiling at me like a cannibal might when stirring soup.  It was sufficiently disconcerting enough for me to change carriages, limping at full speed from one to the other when we pulled into the next station. It wasn't long before he/she decided to swap carriages too and come and smile at me and stroke his/her hair in that bright blue crushed velvet tracksuit and do it from the seat immediately opposite me. Had I longer hair I might have tried stroking my hair in the same manner just for the hell of it. It would have been a synchronized hair stroking event on the train, complete with professional ballroom dancing smiles.